


Shitty Grandpa Omake: Of Fashion and Fiber Markets

by Infinity_formation



Category: Naruto
Genre: Author needs sleep, Izuna is an enabling babysitter, Madara needs a break, Obito’s herb garden from hell, only real tag is Obito spiking Madara's tea with laxative, written at 3AM
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-25
Updated: 2020-05-25
Packaged: 2021-03-03 05:53:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,157
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24369910
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Infinity_formation/pseuds/Infinity_formation
Summary: An omake for Shitty Grandpa for joeriezeilany's birthday! Takes place a few months after Obito is brought back to the Uchiha compound.Obito may have weaseled a trip to town out of Izuna, but he failed to realize the prep work apparently required for such an outing. Fashion is important to Izuna. Proper budgeting and control of clan resources is important to Obito and Madara. They manage. Madara's tea get's spiked.
Relationships: Uchiha Izuna & Uchiha Obito, Uchiha Madara & Uchiha Obito
Comments: 5
Kudos: 38





	Shitty Grandpa Omake: Of Fashion and Fiber Markets

**Author's Note:**

  * For [joeriezeilany](https://archiveofourown.org/users/joeriezeilany/gifts).



> Short Happy Birthday gift to joeriezeilany!!

“No, no, too tacky, too last century, too- uggh! Where did you even find this monstrosity?” Izuna holds out the kimono as far away from him as possible with a disgusted look on his face.

“Our fearless leader hid it in the back of his closet.” Obito deadpans, masterfully dodging the nearest random object Madara selects to throw at him in retaliation.

Today it’s a flower pot.

Rude. He’d spent two days making that. Hope the bastard likes getting the runs from his tea.

“It was given to me by elder Hitomi.” He pauses, looks Obito over. “Perhaps I should give it to you. You could pull it off.”

Izuna makes a face.

Obito calmly takes the kimono back from Izuna “Sure.” He casually drapes it on over his outer layer, briefly checking himself in the mirror.

Madara tenses, where’s the resistance, there’s no way this can be so simple.

Izuna also senses something afoot and carefully starts to reach back out for the monstrosity.

Obito tactfully dodges and starts leaving the room. “I’ll go tell Hitomi-sama about your decision to elope and leave the two of us to sort things out then, shall I?” He picks up speed after the elder’s name and shouts the rest down the hall as he dashes towards the exit.

The brothers curse and it’s only years of training that keep them from running into each other in their mad scramble after him. Izuna is quick to run out the backyard while Madara follows on Obito’s heels out the front like a demon straight from the underworld.

It’s why he’s able to lay in wait and jump him as the two of them round the bend.

Obito pouts from where he allows himself to fall at the bottom of their tussle. They both know this wasn’t a real escape attempt. Izuna can see the herbs Obito must have snatched out of the front garden and is trying to hide in one of the inner pockets he’d stitched into all his clothes.

Izuna rolls his eyes but supposes this level of petty revenge is fair game. “Come on, let’s get back inside before nii-san makes a scene.”

Obito looks like he’s tempted to stall and spark said scene, but he has to live with Izuna, and Izuna’s good at making his life shit and making him feel _bad_ about it. So he allows Izuna to pull him up and push him back inside to hide his loot while Izuna collects Madara.

Madara is steaming as Izuna pulls him back into his brother’s bedroom where they’d started this mess. Obito is sitting calmly to the side of the clothes pile, monstrosity nowhere in sight, the picture of innocence until he makes eye contact with Madara and lets his smug shit eating grin peak out for a split second before disappearing.

Izuna throws an article of clothing in his face before he can start in on the brat. “Focus, nii-san. We need to find something he can wear.”

Right. ‘Appropriate clothing’ to take the brat out in public. He’s so tempted to just leave Izuna in charge of this whole mess. He doesn’t know or care what’s trendy or what the quality of fabric reflects about the brat’s standing. He’d be long gone if he thought he could leave the two of them together without suffering the consequences of it later. An afternoon alone with Izuna was how Obito had gotten the troublesome additions to his herb garden that he now uses as retaliation around the compound. He’d burn them out himself, but it also supplies Obito with the base components for poisons and salves that Izuna has taken an absolute shine to.

Madara knows the brat did it on purpose.

So he’s stuck here. Listening to Izuna toss clothing around the room and mutter about fashion.

The only upside to this is the amount Obito is clearly suffering too.

“You know,” Obito says to him as the near the next hour mark. “If you adjust the seal and allow me to transform, I could just choose the clothes and we’d be done here.”

He wishes he could. He _really_ wishes he could. But the last escape attempt was only three weeks ago and he’s not stupid.

Izuna pauses in his fussing to consider this. “One of us could cast the illusion on you.” He taps a finger on his chin. “But then we’d have to maintain the illusion while we were out and have it drawing on our chakra.”

“I’ll do it.” Sure. Whatever. He’s got chakra to spare. As long as it gets him out of this and doesn’t make Obito into even more of a flight risk, _fine._

He chances a glance at Obito and they share a look. It’s one of those rare moments where they’re in shared misery and complete agreement- they both want out of this room and away from Izuna’s lectures on fashion as quick as possible. In this they’re family.

Izuna doesn’t look happy but he relents with a drawn out sigh. “Fine. I know you’re reserves can handle it nii-san.”

They both start to bolt towards the door-

“- _But_ ” they freeze, Obito in mid lunge and Madara reaching a hand for the door “we have to look around for some fabric while we’re out. Alright you two?”

They both nod frantically and throw themselves out the door and down the hall towards the storeroom.

Madara pauses by the door while Obito quickly opens shelves and digs through bottles. Finally he pulls out an empty container and shakes it. “Need more hemp. We traded the last of it last month.”

Madara sighs. “I thought so. I’ll see what I can do about finding another supplier. Better than buying clothes at least.”

They both shiver.

“There were a few operations in Tea. Water also did shipments, there might be a stock somewhere at a port.”

Madara gives him a look. Obito raises his hand with the bottle in defense. “You know if you let me get the supplies this wouldn’t be an issue.”

Madara pinches the bridge of his nose. “Wouldn’t be an issue because you’d be two leagues east of Water by noon.”

Obito is honest enough to half shrug in admittance.

Madara considers as he watches Obito go back to fiddling with his collection. “Perhaps,”

Obito peers at him over his shoulder.

“Perhaps, if all goes well on this trip and you stop with these token efforts to run off, I might be able to send you on a short trip at the end of the next spring.”

Obito stares at him, straightfaced, then the tension leaves his body and he releases a long sigh, closing the cabinets. “Jiji” He shakes his head and walks past Madara out of the storeroom, making sure to punch him in the arm in the way out.

“Come on, I’ve got poisoned tea to make for you.”

“You _what?!”_


End file.
